Bullying is a very real problem in our school systems and my son has had to combat some very mean, nasty kids. Maybe it is a rite of passage…because I recall my own experience with certain bullies when I was a kid. Having said that, today is way different than it was 25 years ago and I can honestly say without a shed of doubt that the bullies today are more stressed and wound up than they were back in the day and because of that…they are top-notch bullies. Five stars. Gold medalists in their field, if you will. My son continued in this negative environment for three years because I was led to believe he would come out of it bigger, better, and stronger. However in the brief moment I witnessed my son crying...really breaking down over the depths of darkness inside him, I finally was forced to come to terms with just how miserable he was. This is REAL stress guys! That was the end of that school environment for my kids and I am happy to say they are in a way better place and I only wish I had listened to my kids over the ‘professionals’ long before I had.
Anyway, my daughter is creative, spontaneous, and a social guru. She is just like the others her age…diving into all forms of self-expression: music, friends, quirky habits and behaviors, ect. And yet every constant moment she is trying to balance that fine line of becoming the woman she wants to be and staying true to the person her parents see her as. She tries so hard to ‘follow the rules’ and hold to the expectations placed upon her. This is REAL stress guys! For example, her dad is very adamant about ‘NO BOYS!” Don’t think about them, don’t talk to them, don’t look at them, don’t date them…until you are fourty! LOL-Seriously…. And of course, her two best friends are boys. (DUH!) It may seem like nothing really to you, the adult, but to her…it is very hard…living two lives and trying to merge the expectations of her parents as well as the desires to be who she is.
Being isn't easy. I don't know why people think life is supposed to be fair or just. Who the hell ever said it would. But why do we create more crap storms. Why stir up even more hardships for ourselves by wearing masks, hiding who we are, and sacrificing our own happiness. Why not set obtainable goals for ourselves and strive to be happy.
Don't wallow in self-pity because you don't have something, because you don't fit in, because you can't have something. Change things up...set different goals...do something different because obviously whatever you were doing...isn't working. Don't stir up the crap storms in your life...I promise life will throw some pretty good ones your way without your help. So I say we start claiming the lives we want for ourselves. I say we start being true to ourselves. I say we quit giving over control and power and instead take it in our hands...roll it up into a tight ball and aim for the bullseye...and shoot. Even if you don't make it, at least you can say you gave it your very best.