Tuesday, June 25, 2013

On the Eve of Publishing

By JccKeith

On the eve of publishing my very first ever book I find myself in a very familiar situation.  The feelings of doubt, the feelings of wanting to give up because I’m just not good enough to pull this off, the feelings that I won’t succeed, my work won’t be good enough – they all linger in my mind and hold tightly to my heart.  Like a strangling grip around me, they act in a coordinated effort to prevent me from actually publishing the book.

It is frustrating because this is my mind working against the desires of my mind.  I am sabotaging myself.  All of the hard part is done.  All of the story has been typed and edited.  I have printed it out in its entirety just to hold it in my hands to make sure I can do a final edit and see it in front of me on paper rather than a computer screen.  For all intents and purposes my book is finished and ready to be published, the front matter is done, the cover is done, the back is done.  I am waiting on my final once over to make sure I haven’t missed anything.

Yet here I sit, with quiet time reserved just so I can work on this book to get it ready to submit.  Here I sit and I am not working on this all famous once over I need to do.  I am instead contemplating every thing that could possibly go wrong.  I am thinking about negative reviews.  I am thinking about no sales.  I am thinking about no one even noticing my book ever.  I am thinking about how I will feel if no on buys it or downloads it when it’s free.  Can my mind and my heart handle such terrible reviews?  Am I thick skinned and rational enough to weather the tough times?
What this post comes down to is that I am mentally psyching myself up to do this.  I am confronting all possible problems now to make sure I will be mentally and emotionally prepared to put my book out into the great wide world.

As I stated above, these are all familiar feelings.  I remember having every one of them the last year of college.  As graduation time approached and finals loomed, I felt these same feelings.  Was I good enough?  Would people think I was good enough?  It was all a very surreal experience and so is this one it seems.


So what about everyone else out there?  How did you feel just before publishing your book?  Were you a bundle of nerves?  Were you calm and cool?

2 comments:

  1. As I write this, I have just finished up some of the last touches of the collection I will be posting to amazon and such in the next few days. I would love to see it hit huge but I am in this for the long haul and realize that this is the first of many more to come. Eventually they will all be found.

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    1. Looking forward to your collection Jon. Can't wait to read it!

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